It's amazing how she complains about my lack of confidence, yet does everything in her power to make sure I'm torn down. A good example of a "death by a thousand papercuts": called to bring her lunch (it was lunch time, and she was at the office on Saturday). I had gotten up at 5AM to work at a charity event from 6AM to 12 PM. I called her to ask what she wanted, I bought her lunch, I brought the lunch to her, and she complained that I didn't get her fries (the same Sybil that complains about her weight). She didn't appreciate my efforts in caring about what she wants. I really don't care about this incident, because this is typical Sybil. I use it to illustrate how nearly 18 years of this and worse wears the other person down.
I have two choices: quit trying or quit caring. Since it's obvious that Sybil is a complete bitch and always has been, I don't think this is a problem that can be fixed.
5 comments:
I vote for both! trying and caring........hope it improves somehow. G
Well...I've been wanting to improve for 18 years. It never will. It is what it is.
Hey, you may remember me from about 5 years ago, when I went by the name Christian Husband. Anyway, I have a new blog and stuff. And let me say, talking from my personal experiences of the past few months, I cannot recommend enough NOT getting divorced. It sucks worse than I ever imagined. What you've gone through for the past 18 years sucks, and I can understand the wanting to give up and stop trying. I can understand the not wanting to be married anymore. But divorce is worse.
Leave her? Push her to leave you?
I'm sorry, I don't really have any right to say anything...but then, you deserve somebody better!
(((HUGS)))
I'd like to fall back on the old "her low self-esteem makes her force you lower, in her mind, so she feels bigger' but the real lame truth is that bullying is a choice not a condition. you can use whatever term you like and it all comes back to her simply being an incredibly talented bully.
On the choice of divorce, every situation and every person is different. My brother is a new man, back to the great guy I once knew before he got hitched. I've known others who's lives went the other way.
Have you ever considered a convenient accident? Wait, did I just say that? No, didn't think so ....
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