Saturday, June 03, 2006

Youth Sports

Taking a break from "Sybil bashing" for now. I'm posting about youth sports. As you know I have 3 kids. I am in constant awe of them and their abilities. Although I don't write much about them,since this blog was intended to explore the dynamic between Sybil and me. Anyway, my two boys play various sports. My daughter plays a couple too, which is a surprise because she was very much a "girlie-girl" when she was small.

Son #1's Little League baseball team has had a terrible season. Currently, they are 3 and 12. Pretty dismal. He hasn't played much this whole season. It is very disheartening to be one of the oldest on the team, yet play the nearly the least. The previous year, on a different team, he played the whole game, could be counted on to get on base, and improved his fielding. Fast forward to this year, the decreased playing time told him that he wasn't good enough, so in a game he tried harder and put more stress on himself. The result was striking out at the one time at bat and playing 3 or less innings (usually less). Son#1's self-confidence was shot. As the season progressed, it became painfully obvious that he was outside looking in of a clique. The coach and about six of the players knew each other previously. Despite mounting errors and bad plays, he kept them in their positions throughout the season.

Then last week it happened. Son#1's team lost by the "mercy rule." For those that don't know, it says that a ten run difference ends the game. His team got beat 13 to 3. Embarrassing. Who made the most errors? The coach's son at first base. Usually a first baseman can catch. Not on this team. He missed a toss from three feet. After the game, Son#1 walked up to the coach and asked for more playing time. Coach said that he told everyone at the beginning of the season that some wouldn't play as much as others. The ones he thought could do the job would play the most. Sybil and he started to argue. She brought up the valid point that, if you're losing nearly all of your games, why not try players in different positions? Coach said that he wouldn't change anything. Sybil yelled for me saying that Coach said that Son#1 wouldn't get anymore playing time and that he wasn't "good enough." Coach said she was putting words in his mouth. I, in the nicest way possible, said,"Coach, in the first scrimmage he played flawlessly, but in the games Son#1 was passed over." Coach said he was done and stomped off.

Flash forward to Thursday night. Although we won by forfeit because the other team had too few players, we won on the scoreboard too. Son#1 started and stayed at third base. He was on fire. He went 2 for 2 with a bunt (It was a thing of beauty. The ball stopped right in front of home plate, beat the throw and made it to first) and a triple. His defense was good too. For a kid that wasn't "good enough" Son#1 had a stellar night. Coach gave him the game ball.

Afterwards, I talked to Coach. I thanked him for giving Son#1 a second chance. He stated that is wasn't because of the conversation we had, but Son#1 had worked hard in the last practice. Whatever. The season is shot because of the Coach's desire to play certain kids. The parents outside of the clique are fed up. At least the season will end on a high note.

Before I had kids, I told myself I wouldn't get worked up about the sports my children play. I would not be that guy yelling at his kids to do better. Although I am not belligerent, I have a lot of excitement watching my kids play sports. They are far better athletes than I was. Son#1 can actually hit a baseball, Daughter can swim 100 yard freestyle and gets faster towards the end, and Son#2 is like a Hoover vacuum cleaner on the baseball field. Before my sons played baseball, I was pretty ambivalent towards it. Daughter played one year of softball and was decent. I wish she would've stuck with it. It has been a tremendous amount of fun, excitement, and even pride to watch my children play ball. I hope all parents get that opportunity.

2 comments:

Anteros said...

I remembered the same kind of treatment when I was in little league. Honestly, when you're that age no one is "stellar" and should be given preferential treatment IMO. I think everyone should have the opportunity to play, and learn the different positions.

I was never really very good but treating kids the way you'd begin to treat pro players isn't what youth ball is all about. It wasn't until later that I started playing softball as an adult that I really began to excel, and I earned my position at 2nd base. If kids never get the chance to play each position how will they ever know what they are good at? Not to mention the devastating conidence issues.

Good for you two for standing up for your children, youth coaches do that crap because they can get away with it. Let them know they cannot indeed get away with it and it should decline.

aphron said...

Anteros-

The sad part is now that the season is over and we're into tournaments, Son#1 has lost valuable playing time.

Until these leagues are able to get coaches that don't have kids on the team, this stuff will continue. Unfortunately, people will not volunteer to help out.

On a side note: a good friend of his, who is very good at baseball, has had a terrible time on a different team with a different coach. He has given up on baseball altogether. His father is not happy.

Thanks for the comment.